Friday, 14 May 2010

angsty

hi these aren't technically meant to be poems as i don't really know how to write poems, plus the word poem annoys me, they're just verbal diarrhea that for some unbeknown reason i feel the need to make public, some more art work will be coming soon, i promise..... 


sometimes the chaos rises up
and it swallows up everything good and clear and precise that i work towards,
i believe in discipline,
i believe in a whole being made from hard work and care,
but when the chaos comes i cannot stop it,
everything i trust and work for scatters and all that is left is confusion and melancholy
and this sense that i was doing something really good,
but that it somehow got lost,

its lost right now but i'm trying to reel it back in,
in my head there will be a day when the chaos will never come to visit,
when i won't invite it in
and it'll have to slither away,
i don't know if age is the thing that would keep the chaos out
or if its discipline,
or if its both

but i hope one day i won't have chaos in my life

but really isn't all this inevitably pointless?
aren't we all puppets to desire,
the desire for a lifestyle enabled by colour,
this dream of freedom that so rarely translates to our lives
but instead leaves us in fits of fantasy,
everyone i know is touched by what ifs,
by maybes,
we can break free but the the blue pill tastes soo good,

i know i'm going to live in my little box for some time to come

3 comments:

  1. How would you feel if I critiqued these mind wobblings? I could give you some good pointers. Make them sharper?

    ReplyDelete
  2. woman no! there is no need they're not really meant to be sharper or better, just some ramblings to help my mind

    ReplyDelete
  3. i like the line " the desire for a lifestyle enables by colour" =]

    ReplyDelete

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